Sordid Dalliance

My toes clip the sea

And my arms reach for the sky

My mind on you here.

And when a fire burns

Or a cold wind snaps, it bites 

I will long for you

On dark hollow nights

I restlessly toss and turn 

Alone, I need you

Then, after tears rain

Pain seeps in, you never come

I cry out for none

I ask for my love

But you not one before me

I drown in sorrow

.....

.......

.....

You kissed my hand twice

I remember to the day

You then kissed my face

We sat under a tree

And beneath the summer sun

In gold tinted haze

And I always laughed

For you a smile not enough

Left wrinkles behind

Smoking mild cigars

And telling secrets to you

Knowing what love was

It was never right

They said love is often not

And so we went forth 

I often feared loss

A grave consequence of love 

And you calmed my heart

Now not clandestine 

Delicate balance of souls

Pain in potential 

.....

.......

.....

I left with good-bye

As things end in an instant

And I just felt numb

Change was unruly

And so the pain came quick, hard

Excruciating

And I wept freely 

Saved by a bottle and pen

Nights writing to you

I whispered your name

And I cried for your return 

My hopes unanswered

Time dried many tears

Calendar pages flew away

You now, a dull throb

Everything you love is right here

a murmurous voice whispers your name
and on lonely nights I whisper it back
reminded of our sordid dalliance
I weep for you.
ephemeral entanglements still damning

trembling hands cannot hold effervescent passions
as in the lips that kiss away a tear
never a question of what might have been
I collected the ashes
they fell like sands in an hour glass.

for a moment I knew love.
for a lifetime I knew pain.
evocative veneration met no forbearance
and to you I am bound.
ineffable agony a harbinger for love lost.

A single tree the only witness to incurable affection
a secret longed for
with the delicate strength of a gossamer
fear rivaled love in our heart's mind
and I flew away from you

I carry pieces, a photo, a letter, a book
and we stand under the same sky
telling us to forgo the call of the void
so youre left carrying the most Mellifluous letter:
Everything you love is right here.

Carved in Stone

I love you despite all ills known
And I love you despite my own
A single soul we do make
Hearts divide and bodies break

Four of limb and two of face
A body made of power and grace
We were torn for love too strong
But to one another we were drawn

A lonely half-self lost of aim                                        
Upon my other I soon came
And though every sweet kiss is doomed to fade
Strength of heart such distance made

My loving arms for you will hold
Born a new power they will mold
I keep you close for my own gain
To part from you is to know true pain

And as the nights of ours depart                              
I pull you closer to my own heart
For not is there a way to say
But, I have loved you every day

We now laugh as we face fear                  
Strength unmatched whilst you are near
Destined we, to unite once more
T'was for love, my only war

One deep kiss my hide the face                                  
Our uniting soul in everlasting embrace
In the end it shall be known                            
My love for you was carved in stone



Inspired by: Brancusi, The Kiss

And based on the myth: "Humans were originally created with 4 arms, 4 legs and a head with two faces. Fearing their power, Zeus split them into two separate parts, condemning them to spend their lives in search of their other halves."

Layers

Lovers become layers we may never shed
they live in our hearts and they lie in our bed
we carry them with us, wearing them like a sleeve
to our body, our mind, and our hearts no repreive

Andy my young love you are my shoes
with your guitar and red truck you cured my youthful blues
together we walked in the little town square
dreams of a future that would take us somewhere

For Ernest my deep love you are my dress
my passion for you I could never fully express
you were the one who covered the most of me
I tried to escape you but I will never be free

Oh Ryan, my dear love, you are my sweater
the snow found our love, memories held in an old letter
for seasons we grew and held eachother near
with time we were lost, real reasons unclear

And Matthew my patient love, you are my hat
I waited and pined not knowing what would begat
You lived in my mind, you would not leave my head
until you came to me, leaving no words unsaid

My loves, I wear you, I forever keep you near
not by choice, not by hope, not by memory or fear
For love, it changes you, it becomes who you are
For love, it cannot be shed, not for time, long or distance, afar.

Third Grade Feet

They slipped on perfectly, though I had to pull the back strap a tiny bit just to wiggle my heel in. They were the height of fashion, and looked good with any outfit. They were my favorite pair. Clear with sparkles, they glimmered in the sunlight. They had a silver clip on the side, and they covered my toes with a rounded tip. They were very strappy, multiple clear sparkled bands criss-crossing my size 5 third grade foot. They were my  Jellies. 

I was wearing them the day that we had a special music lesson in the gym. The lights turned down and my feet shimmered from any light that snuck into the darkened room. We all sat on the floor not particularly organized. Some next to friends, others close to the screen that would eventually play a movie. Jacob Bloomer sat next to me. A small part of me panicked, because Emily, my best friend and envier of my coveted Jellies, had just passed Jacob a note telling him I had a crush on him. He returned the note, it said "me too". 

Jacob Bloomer and I grew up. He never knew that he was my first crush. He probably doesn't remember passing notes in the third grade. But it wasn't really about Jacob Bloomer. It was about being a third grader. Realizing I liked a boy, making friendships where we were jealous of each-others clothes, we learned to keep secrets, and told boys we liked them. It was about winning and losing in innocent love. It was about playing on the playground and going to music class. It was about my favorite pair of shoes. Shoes that I wore every day, and when the strap finally broke I cried. It is about a memory.

The Importance of being Ernest

She said that she looked into his eyes
she called them "forever blue"
this changed everything
they told her secrets and she craved them

together they became
feigning interest in the trifles for simple love
to carrying the heavy things in passion
invisible forces willing them away

a photo in black and white
as in nostalgia, trying to grasp the falling sands
and the welling fear that the past is gone
though vivid as this moment

she said she saw through him
an image not of vision, but of sentiments
his figure, now just the arms that held her
his face, the butterflies in her stomach

a small tree in green grass
the only witness to such insatiable love
a first kiss, a last kiss, many tears
fallen leaves a tribute to the lovelorn

it was not the love of bodies
as in the essence of two intertwined
pressing close enough together to become one
the realization that you were never whole

she said she let him in
strength of a monster, destroying fortifications
two vulnerable hearts with only one fear
as strong as they are weak

the days blew away in the wind
time and hearts grew colder with the season
love never leaves, nor does it fade
and a word was spoken to destroy worlds

ink and tears dripped in his name
as in the lesson that life is change
the heartache's mind a dangerous sanctuary
forever to harbor empty love

she said she told him to love her

Wait

The word is "wait"
a state of repose,
as in him who I
linger, sojourn, anticipate
and I answered forever.

Hurry

Hurry cat- scratch, its almost 2:00 and the fat bird waits on no one. You tell the doctor not to call me but he stands on the mountain throwing pickles on passers-by, the Heathens, Heathen. Time wears a red robe and the children pull and the threads as they eat the sour cucumbers and yell in anger at the bald horse eating from the bag and even the shoes haven't a kick in the world and the pit in the plum pouts pitiful drops of sweet blood. You holler in silence at the dirty dog because that trash on the table feeds your appetite for salt and fear and he eats the falling rocks that bound up the sea. see. sea. World means nothing to you and the pigs called dinner but everything to the tires and feet and ants. Nonsense? You coward. Fool-heartedly fretting the Myth of Sisyphus and the Notes from the Underground. Never understanding a word of the bark or squawk because you too speak the nothing words of the gods. glory for the sake of glory, you're a glutton for the feel good things. Droppin' dollars on dogs on beats by the kids they call old hats now because they lived in the lemon drop days.  




<a href="http://www.ontoplist.com/" target="_blank" title="Online Marketing"><img src="http://www.ontoplist.com/images/ontoplist32.png?id=521c495ce309e" alt="Online Marketing" border="0" /></a><br>Add blog to our <a href="http://www.ontoplist.com/blog-directory/" title="blog directory">blog directory</a>.